A fan.

I never had a fan before, I was nothing but a ordinary people, little people. When I was not knowing that I am special and or talented and not aware of my worth. During those days when I was having low self - esteem those innocent, gentle, sweet and lovely days - I miss those day, no pressure or tensions - no zeal to achieve something, no desperation to become a great person, no dreams; 0 dreams. I was happy just living my life a very ordinary way. I love it to be selfless and that detached from world, unaware and unheeded by the world, when there was none who was dedicated to me and my works. My the best friend tasted me first fan feeling but she wasn't exactly a fan, she is my special - those days I met a fan. When I met my fan for the first time - I met a fan; precisely he met me.

"Hi Cass, I love your writings, paintings and drawings, and poems also, I like the way you live and the recklessness in you awesome!"

I said, "What? Hello . . . how you know me?"

"I am your fan, and I want your autograph." Took his autograph book and gave it to me. You should see my excitement. I never had a fan before. I jumped like a baby, shouted like hell and was like child who got his first ice cream. I did that all in front of him.

"You are not joking? And are you still my fan? After those monkey jumping and shouting?"

"Yes I am your fan. I love your style. I will even die for you."

"You don't have to die. Okay take my autograph. Celebrate it. Be happy." I never had any camera before else I would have taken a lot of pictures where this all happened with him. Hmmm! I miss those days, now it's so common. Now I wanna intensify the fans excitement. The kind of attention and welcome a star gets. I want that. I hope my excitement will get back to me when I become successful, a huge hit. I need only one hit now. God please give me one hit.

The best part is when they know me and I don't know them. A lot hell of people remember my name and me. It's like in mind I say to myself, "Who are you?" and try to guess them with their words. I never say on their face that I don't know them. I don't want to be rude and arrogant. I wanna be soft and tender. I love all my fans and well wishers. Thank you for your love on me. I love you guys. I miss you ya . . . !