Incite love!

I have these desires, oh! God, they kill me. But I cannot implement them. And I really want them but I can't get them. I am like why the fuck I am so intelligent? Why I got these animal instincts that torment me?

You cannot even imagine why I want a strong man as my husband, you don't fit in my stereotype of male. Nothing of you seems to fit in my desires, nothing but . . . the emotions I have on you. It's the irony. Why I have what I have on you?

I am sure you cannot give me what I want then why I love you so much? Why this love . . . abyss of love on a man who does not even care about me? Not a clue. I wish I could just to go my native place ASAP. Hmm! How tormenting it is for me here. I have this control on myself. But . . . mind . . . who has the guts to control it. It reaches to its peak. You don't know how hard for me to resist to grab you and kiss you so hard that you would never depart. But . . . you don't love me. You are not a white.

Before it was so nice, I know what I wanted. I just want a white guy. Now; You in between, it's so complicated. You just can't give me what I desire. Why the hell I have to fall for you? Hell.

I don't compromise, in my life, if I want Benz I want that only, not any stupid cars in between. I got that level of self control and patience. I would walk rather get into another car of not my kind.

Bloody can you imagine without any taste of heaven for 24years? Can you at least imagine? Not even the dew drops and fueling is the love on you? The only parameter stops me is my love! I want a man who could love me with his heart and soul. But finding the only one seems . . . the impossible.

Once I could find, God! I would be no more be this thirsty again! I need not control, no more, sky is the limit. My rules, bloody my genetic make up. Bytes, can't take it any more but have to, can't use it but got immense knowledge in that, can't wait for it but I have no other choice, and can't even do it with any other man just like that.

My mate!

The burning desires . . . ! Whispering in my ears and letting me to hallucinate into the world of intimate closure. Not able to come out of the web of adumbrate fantasies.

Hell of hell. Do you at least comprehend my pain? The innate pain caused by your incite love?